jk rowling and notch are both members of my case study “does being richer than god turn you into a fucking moron” and it turns out the answer is a hard yes
it rules that i can tell jkr did something dumb as shit because this gets another surge of notes
Tag: harry potter
It baffles and infuriates me that Hogwarts students don’t take Latin or Greek. Accio? Literally “I summon.” Lumos? Fucking “light.” Expelliarmus? Expel weapon!! Ooooh I wonder what Levicorpus does– you Dumb Ass Bastard. You ILLITERATE. It’s called Levicorpus, it lifts someone’s body, it LEVIES your goddamn CORPUS-
@hogwarts mystery
pls stop making me learn stuff to duel i just want to have an owl and play quidditch and learn cool spells and visit hagrid and drink butterbeer and date bill weasley
that’s what harry potter wanted to do too but he had to stay alive, didnt he
i’m so puzzled by harry potter fics where hermione’s doing the majority of the childcare instead of ron. hermione is ruthless and driven and a single child and boy does she get easily frustrated with people being stupid or weak. ron’s from a big family with an attentive mom and he’s an extremely sweet and supportive guy. if i was going to pick a full-time parent i’d go with ron every time.
like ron is the parent that teaches you to read and write and cook and ride a broom and share your toys and make up with your friends. hermione is the parent that picks your schoolyard bully up by the scruff and throws him over the fence and gets banned from all future PTA meetings.
my child co-founded an informal harry potter club at school last week. this week, all clubs were officially disbanded by the teacher. in an ironic twist, my child (who hasn’t read ootp yet) said today, ‘but that doesn’t mean a group of friends can’t get together and talk about harry potter. we just can’t say that we’re a club’
Life imitates art pre-emptively
hufflepuff: what’s your biggest weakness?
slytherin: i can be uncooperative
hufflepuff: okay, give me an example.
slytherin: no.
Water Witches 